Member-only story
Panic @ Anywhere
CW: Mental Health, Panic Attacks, Panic Disorder, BPD
It can strike at any time. Looking at me from behind the brush, studying me and my triggers. It knows that if I suspect it’s there I will run, and escape its grasp. So it watches and waits.
My panic is the most patient trait about me. It has the patience that my non-panic self wishes I had in everyday life. It isn’t picky about when it strikes, and it isn’t picky about why. But it is a sensitive trait, in that it will go off unhinged, and completely take over situations that I was mentally unprepared for. Even if they are simple things like going to work.
This morning I went to work, it was a normal start of my week. I checked my emails and went to start helping my crew finish some tasks when suddenly my hands were shaking uncontrollably, and my left eye started to twitch. I tried not to think much of it until I started a task and had to double over the boxes because I was having sudden extreme nausea and vertigo, and felt like I was going to fall over.
I started to breathe heavily and fast, my lips quickly going numb, and found a trusted peer to help me clock out and drive me to the emergency room. I was scared of blacking out, and the movement of the car wasn’t helping me at all. My peer was really helpful, trying to get me to talk about something else with him to try and distract…
